BRENDA SAYS: "Sorry to make all of you endure my odd thoughts AGAIN but think of it this way, I've had to endure myself for 27 years now and all I'm asking is that you read one rambling little blurb (or delete it but never tell me that)...thanks for enduring me!"
"Did you ever notice that no matter how complicated your life is, the later you stay up, the more it makes sense? Suddenly, you feel smarter, too-every thought is a deep one. My toothpaste isn't really blue and it isn't really green either. Somehow it is the perfect fusion of the two. Problem solving skills increase as well. The longer I stay awake, the braver I seem to get about resolving things...Tomorrow I'm going to go over to the neighbors and tell them what pigs they really are!...ah, pigs, that's a funny word! Pigs, pigs, piggies, little piggly wigglies, little piggly wiggly gigglies. Oh, I've got the gigglies. What's the difference between a laugh and a giggle? How about the difference between a smurk and a smile and do you have to be a smart alec to smurk? Back up a second to smart alec, who was this famous "Alec" that created a reputation understood nationwide? The nation is a big place. I need to travel, see more of it. There's a whole world out there, just waiting to be explored (Wow, another bottomless insight). Maybe tomorrow I'll pick a destination and set everything in motion to travel there. Um, I feel like snacking, could use some chocolate. I hate the aftertaste of sweet things though so i'll have to follow it up with something salty. Meat tastes especially good during the hours it should not even be accessible. It's so weird that just when my mind reaches a peak of clarity, it would appear that the rest of me is useless. Here I've stayed up 3 1/2 hours later than I ever should have and what did I accomplish? I ate a little bowl of ice cream and thought-ALOT-and none of the things I contemplated even really matter so I basically sat up just to literally sit around and waste time. Tomorrow I will feel okay until the afternoon hits and then I will pay dearly for wasting the night away. I will morph into this mean, ornery person I never intended to be just because I couldn't think deeply enough to tell myself to get up and get into bed. Even now, I sit here telling myself I should wrap things up and call it a night but I just can't bring myself to get up off this blasted couch! Well, I do have one more resolve to add to the list-tomorrow I'm going to bed early."
BRENDA SAYS: "These days, it is a feat just to bathe each day. With my first child, no problem. I started out just getting a bath before she woke up because I was always up first and on the rare occasion she was already awake, I'd just leave the door open a tiny bit in case she needed me and she'd stay out of trouble while I was in there. If she did want to be near me, she was no trouble. I didn't have to worry about the toilet paper getting unrolled, my bath water being splashed all across America, or the cabinet being stripped of its contents. Life was more easily clean then. Bathing now is a testimony that I'm dedicated to cleanliness because it is quite the task. My second child is, well, not at all the first in any way whatsoever. Even when he was a baby, he had to be near me all the time so I'd put him in his carseat on the floor while I scrubbed as fast as humanly possible but the second I stopped making faces and cooing noises of insanity at him, he'd just bawl. As he grew, the routine became more complicated, according to his mobility and volume. The stories could last for days but I'll just fast forward to recently, the last two months or so. I would love to be clean and ready for the day before he wakes up and I even try (and often do) wake up early just for that purpose. However, somehow that boy has an alarm attached from me to him. Literally the second I move to get out of bed, he's yelling, "Mommy!" and he's too loud to just leave yelling or he'll wake the others. I often check my watch and sigh with relief, thinking I'll finally be able to get ready before he "needs" me but the second my leg sneaks out of the blankets, his screaming starts. I can't even empty my bladder before his lungs are starting on their workout. So he's awake, shouldn't be a big deal, right? Unfortunately he can't keep himself entertained outside of the bathroom. He's a choco-holic and I could set him down with a pound of Belgian bliss and it still couldn't keep him happy. If I'm busy, he senses the need to interrupt. I try to just let him hang out in the bathroom with me but no matter how baby proof the bathroom is, that child is an emergency room visit waiting to happen. I can barely even reach for the soap before he's got the electric razor shaving the toilet paper into tiny shreds and the mirror shattered and the toilet overflowing. He's even been known to climb into the tub with his clothes on. This year is the terrible twos for him and so I cling mercilessly to the hope this will all end. Just when I think I could knock some sense into that child, he smiles and hugs me and says, "I lub ya" and all I can do is thank my lucky stars for him and enjoy our time together. I enjoy my time with my daughter, too, but I don't feel as exhausted by her."
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Okay, so I'm watching an episode of Scrubs (NBC) and at the end JD is asking Elliott about [some guy that she was dating]'s fantasy (which is why Elliott and the guy broke up), He asks:
JD:"Will you tell me what Jake's Fantasy was?"
JD:"Did it involve chains?"
JD:"Was he a Mexican Apple Thief?"
EL:"hhhh... If only.."
So, Of course, I Google "Mexican Apple Thief"
So, I ask... WHAT IS A MEXICAN APPLE THIEF????
--UPDATE.. Figured it out... Apparently earlier in the show I completely missed Elliott telling her boyfriend Jake, her fantasy:
Jake: Why don't you tell me your wildest fantasy?
Elliot: OK, fine. You're a mexican apple thief. I run the cider house. I catch you hiding behind the stone mill. You chase me into the tasting room. Oh, if there's a crow in there: fine. If not.. I can live with it. Anyway, we're all alone and you don't speak a word of english, but you teach me more about hard cider than I ever learned from my fermenting exams and our passion is so loud that they can hear it all the way in the distillery (breaths hard) Oh, ha.. I can be such an apple slut!
Jake: Um.. okay!
--Now I know...
BRENDA SAYS: "Just wanted to pass the word along that this year, I have not made one single resolution and I'm the queen of resolutions!!! It's not that I don't need improvement because heaven knows I do. It's just that I'm flawed enough that I'm not prepared to set goals one year at a time but I'm also free enough to know that that's okay. Life's a journey and I may be on a little detour, straying from the typical path a little, but viewing something too beautiful to miss or hurry away from. I've become much more introverted in the last year and while a part of me longs to give it up and immerse myself in people and their energy in general, another part of me finds comfort and sanctity in the quiet of retreat. I feel bliss at being rewarded with my husband and the miraculous lives and learnings of our children. For the first time in my life, I don't long for much more. Spiritually, I should perhaps strive for a deeper commitment but in alot of ways, isn't truly being happy, or at least closer to it, a strong form of spirituality? Some steps in our spiritual quest are less time-consuming than others but I guess steps are steps. Maybe I write to make peace with myself. Maybe I share it to be less misunderstood. Truth is I may never understand myself, let alone lead anybody else to understand me but there is fulfillment in the unfolding of meditated words. Gratitude for enduring my wee wanderings and may you enjoy your own adventure. Dude, you rock!"
As always, you can go to my homepage to check out my jump points to some of my other sites: http://www.geocities.com/d_skye_hodges